I'm alive

Yes, I'm alive. So much going on, just struggling to survive. No time now for bullshit or jive, just droppin a line to say I'm alive.

Redemption Draweth Nigh

A new favorite song/video

"O' Thou Blessed Rock of Ages"

Interesting quote from the Simpsons

“Romance is dead - it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.”
--Lisa Simpson

The "not so happy" birthday

Just an update on how the birthday went the other day. One word comes to mind - TERRIBLE!

Yes, my birthday really was terrible all the way around. I spent most of it at work; dealing with meetings and planning sessions for the implementation of the new CMS we are getting at work. It just went on and on and on; grant it my work day started at 4:30am wednesday morning, and didn't end until 5:30pm wednesday evening. You talk about a long assed day.

Once I finally got out of work and made my way home, I was in a really bad mood and didn't really feel like doing anything. I struggled off and on all day to get ahold of April, who it turns out had an unfortunate accident with her cell phone. Phone was dropped in water or something, which explains why I couldn't get in touch with her. I ended up driving to her house, and banging on the door. Grrr.

April and I attempted to go out for dinner for my birthday, and I might have known that it would fall apart. We went to the Chili's restaurant here in town, and I must say that I was appauld by the poor service and low quality of the food. We got there, and were seated fairly quickly, and everything went to hell from there.

We sat there for more than 10 mins before anyone came over to take either drink or dinner orders, despite the fact that the waiter had walked past us repeatedly. Now, this place was no where near busy; in fact, the damn place was almost empty. So, in my estimation, there should have been no reason for us to have waited so long. We should have just walked out, and believe me, we certainly won't be going back. We won't be recommending the place to any of our friend either. Fuck Chili's and there baby back ribs too.

Anyway, after dinner I dropped April off at her place, so she could get her car and my presents. She showed up at my place with this huge chocolate chip cookie cake that said happy birthday mike. This thing is enormous; it weighs more than 5 pounds, and is about 14 inches in diameter and 3 inches thick. And sweet as hell. That cheered me up a bit, and the fact that she spent the night made it even better.

Anyway, I have things to do, so I'll write more when I feel like it. Ciao!

Happy Birthday to ME!

I would like to wish a wonderful Happy 23rd Birthday day to ME! Yep, today is my birthday. Unfortunately, the majority of it will be spent working, and that really sucks. The only good thing about that, is I am paid hourly, so the longer I work, the more money I will make. Money is always good.

I don't really have any plans for the evening. I guess I will be seeing April at some point, and maybe go to dinner, but I'm not really in the mood for much. I gotta work most of the day, and to top it off, it is pouring rain outside.

Anyway, Hopefully I will find some joy in this day, and will make it through unscathed. For now, it's back to the grind stone.

No Tears in Heaven

NO TEARS IN HEAVEN
written by Robert S. Arnold

No tears in heaven, no sorrows given.
All will be glory in that land;
There'll be no sadness, all will be gladness,
When we shall join that happy band.

No tears (in heaven fair).
No tears, no tears up there,
Sorrow and pain will all have flown;
No tears (in heaven fair).
No tears, no tears up there;
No tears in heaven will be known.

Glory is waiting, waiting up yonder,
Where we shall spend an endless day;
With Christ our Savior, we'll be forever,
Where sorrow no more can dismay.

No tears (in heaven fair).
No tears, no tears up there,
Sorrow and pain will all have flown;
No tears (in heaven fair).
No tears, no tears up there;
No tears in heaven will be known.

Music

Music speaks what cannot be expressed,
soothes the mind and gives it rest,
heals the heart and makes it whole,
flows from heaven to the soul.

Wow, long time no post.

It has been a long time since I have posted anything on this blog, and I thought I would post a brief update, so my few readers don't think I have completely vanished from the earth.

I have been quite busy with work, with completing a restaurant review archive, and preparing for a new CMS that we will be implementing in the coming months. Very exciting stuff, but it is also very tiring.

On the flip side, my personal life has been somewhat of a roller coaster as of late. I have been very tired, both physically and mentally, and have been struggling with a lot of different issues. I can't really get into details.

I feel like I have been in the middle of a storm, and have yet to find a way out.
I only hope I see the light soon.

More later.

Peace In The Eye Of The Storm

Peace In The Eye Of The Storm
by: Jill Lemming

Let us find peace in an angry world

let us strive harder each day

to live as your people, humble and good

without violence and vengeance, we pray.

Let us walk proud, united as one

determined to live by our faith

trusting Your guidance in all that we do

thankful for the gift of Your Grace.

Lord, we are strong, not by ourselves

but with Your Spirit abiding within

every moment of every day

we surrender to You once again.

With our country in turmoil and bound in sin

we plead for a change still to come

Lord, give us leaders who rely on You

to direct what this world will become.

We leave our future in Your loving Hands

in the midst of a World that is torn

whatever we face, we know You are there

to bring peace in the eye of the storm.

Colts win Super Bowl XLI

Despite a sloppy game in rain soaked Miami, the Indianapolis Colts have won Super Bowl XLI.
Congratulations to the Colts, the city of Indianapolis, and the state of Indiana on this win.

More commentary to come later......

Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye to someone dear to you is never easy, no matter what the circumstances. When someone dies, suddenly or expected, there is a period of grief that family and friends go through. Sadly enough, I am no exception.

There's no easy way to say it, so I'll just get to the point. My 89 yr old great grandmother died.
Granny's long struggle finally ended around 6:30 pm on Thursday, January 18, 2007. Thank God she is no longer suffering, and she is in a better place.

There was a memorial service held in Louisville this past weekend, and of course I went down there. I must say that over all, everything went ok. I haven't been doing very well with any of it, and actually collapsed in the middle of the memorial service. There was also a major misunderstanding, that could have ended very badly. Some things were said about me, and when the conversation was relayed back to me, the message was garbled, and with my emotions as fragile as they were, I lost it, and was ready to hurt the parties involved. Thankfully for everyone, the situation ended peacefully.

I came back to Fort Wayne on Tuesday, and went back to work on Wednesday. This is super bowl week, so work has been extra crazy for me. Will be glad when it is all over.

Mentally, I'm still reeling from my grandmothers death, and will be for quite some time. I'm trying to deal as best as I can, and April is being real understanding about everything, but it's still very difficult for me. I can't do anything with out thinking about Granny, and all of the bullshit that has gone on the last few months. As I said before, I am thankful she is no longer suffering, and is in a better place.

My prayer is that god will comfort us all, and guide us as we deal with this loss, and move on with our lives. God help us all.

Hanging in there

"I'm hangin in, there ain't no doubt, and I'm hangin tough, over and out." - George Carlin.

Just wanted to post a brief message to let me few readers know I'm still around. There's alot of things going on right now, and I'm having trouble dealing with all of it. As the quote says, I'm hangin in there, and I'm trying to stay tough through it all.

My grandmother is still with us, but it's only a matter of time before she is gone. The last couple of weeks have been bad. One day she's near dead, and the next day she has rebounded a bit. It's back and forth, and for everyone's sake, I wish it would just end. She's ready to die, and I wish she would. Sounds bad, but it's true. She wouldn't be hurting anymore, and I wouldn't be worrying myself sick anymore. God, just get it over with already.

On a positive note, I have finally managed to complete the restaurant review database project I have been struggling with for work. Put the finishing touches on it this morning, and everyone seems happy with it. We'll see what the coming weeks bring in terms of feedback on that. I'm sure there will be changed that I have to make, but for now, I'm done.

Anyway, I've been up since 3:00 am, and I'm dead tired. Time to go sleep. Ciao!

General George Patton Talks About Iraq War

If Patton were in charge of this war, it would have ended 4 years ago. He may have been politically incorrect, but by god Patton knew what he was doing.

Back in Fort Wayne

Just wanted to let my few readers know that I am back in Fort Wayne now. I got back late last night; just in time to go to bed so I could get up and come to work at 4:30am this morning.

My grandmother is still with us, but that is subject to change at any time. I must say I have never seen her look as bad as she does now, and I really don't expect her to be around much longer. I am honestly hoping, for her sake and everyone elses, that she will pass fairly soon. She is suffering, and is quite miserable. She has no quality of life being bed-ridden now, and unable to do much more than lay there.

I was in Louisville from Thursday afternoon until Sunday afternoon, and the whole time I was there I kept wishing that it would just end while I was down there. I hate the idea of having to return to Fort Wayne, only to be called back to Louisville a few days or so later.

I made the decision to return to Fort Wayne, based on the fact that there really isn't anything that I can do down there, other than sit and wait for her to die. Since I have work, and other obligations here in Fort Wayne, I felt it best that I just come back up here and get on with things until I have to return to Louisville for the funeral.

Despite knowing that there was nothing I could do there, and that my grandmother wouldn't want me to sit there worrying, it was very difficult for me to leave. I was in tears when I got to the car, and I must also say that it takes a lot to make me cry. I know in my heart, that yesterday afternoon was the last time that I will ever see her alive. I can't begin to describe how much it hurts me to know that.

So, it's a painful waiting game now. Just a matter of time before she is gone, and I receive that phone call. I am not looking forward to it, but I am expecting it and am prepared to deal with it when it comes.

Please keep all of us in prayer as we trudge through the rough days ahead.