If Patton were in charge of this war, it would have ended 4 years ago. He may have been politically incorrect, but by god Patton knew what he was doing.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Monday, January 01, 2007
Back in Fort Wayne
Just wanted to let my few readers know that I am back in Fort Wayne now. I got back late last night; just in time to go to bed so I could get up and come to work at 4:30am this morning.
My grandmother is still with us, but that is subject to change at any time. I must say I have never seen her look as bad as she does now, and I really don't expect her to be around much longer. I am honestly hoping, for her sake and everyone elses, that she will pass fairly soon. She is suffering, and is quite miserable. She has no quality of life being bed-ridden now, and unable to do much more than lay there.
I was in Louisville from Thursday afternoon until Sunday afternoon, and the whole time I was there I kept wishing that it would just end while I was down there. I hate the idea of having to return to Fort Wayne, only to be called back to Louisville a few days or so later.
I made the decision to return to Fort Wayne, based on the fact that there really isn't anything that I can do down there, other than sit and wait for her to die. Since I have work, and other obligations here in Fort Wayne, I felt it best that I just come back up here and get on with things until I have to return to Louisville for the funeral.
Despite knowing that there was nothing I could do there, and that my grandmother wouldn't want me to sit there worrying, it was very difficult for me to leave. I was in tears when I got to the car, and I must also say that it takes a lot to make me cry. I know in my heart, that yesterday afternoon was the last time that I will ever see her alive. I can't begin to describe how much it hurts me to know that.
So, it's a painful waiting game now. Just a matter of time before she is gone, and I receive that phone call. I am not looking forward to it, but I am expecting it and am prepared to deal with it when it comes.
Please keep all of us in prayer as we trudge through the rough days ahead.
My grandmother is still with us, but that is subject to change at any time. I must say I have never seen her look as bad as she does now, and I really don't expect her to be around much longer. I am honestly hoping, for her sake and everyone elses, that she will pass fairly soon. She is suffering, and is quite miserable. She has no quality of life being bed-ridden now, and unable to do much more than lay there.
I was in Louisville from Thursday afternoon until Sunday afternoon, and the whole time I was there I kept wishing that it would just end while I was down there. I hate the idea of having to return to Fort Wayne, only to be called back to Louisville a few days or so later.
I made the decision to return to Fort Wayne, based on the fact that there really isn't anything that I can do down there, other than sit and wait for her to die. Since I have work, and other obligations here in Fort Wayne, I felt it best that I just come back up here and get on with things until I have to return to Louisville for the funeral.
Despite knowing that there was nothing I could do there, and that my grandmother wouldn't want me to sit there worrying, it was very difficult for me to leave. I was in tears when I got to the car, and I must also say that it takes a lot to make me cry. I know in my heart, that yesterday afternoon was the last time that I will ever see her alive. I can't begin to describe how much it hurts me to know that.
So, it's a painful waiting game now. Just a matter of time before she is gone, and I receive that phone call. I am not looking forward to it, but I am expecting it and am prepared to deal with it when it comes.
Please keep all of us in prayer as we trudge through the rough days ahead.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
On the road again!
I will be on the road again this morning, as I am going to Louisville to see my great grandmother before she dies. Her health has been rapidly declining, and I have been expecting to have to go down there for a while now. I decided last night that I would be driving down there today.
I am hoping that she will hold on until after the new year, but it's honestly just a matter of time before it happens.
I will be gone until Saturday or Sunday. It may be longer depending on what happens.
I will post updates as I can. God be with me as I travel, and God be with the family as we cope with this difficult situation.
I am hoping that she will hold on until after the new year, but it's honestly just a matter of time before it happens.
I will be gone until Saturday or Sunday. It may be longer depending on what happens.
I will post updates as I can. God be with me as I travel, and God be with the family as we cope with this difficult situation.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
A few thoughts
Perhaps someone reading my last post might have gotten the impression that I'm just hateful, evil, etc... because of my feelings towards the holidays this year. Well, I'd like to make a few things clear.
First of all, I really don't hate the holidays. I like Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc... I like the time I can spend with my family and friends this time of the year. I like some of the decorations, and some of the gift giving is ok too. Although, I do believe the gift giving and money spending is over rated.
My negative feelings towards the holidays stem from the loss of my uncle, who died 4 years ago. My uncle was a big part of my life, and he was part of what made the holidays so wonderful. He was just like a big ol' kid, especially at Christmas. He was just as excited as the kids were. Since his death, my attitude towards the holidays has deminished a lot. The holidays are not the same. There is a large void, and nothing seems to fill it.
I try to deal with it, for everyone elses sake, but I could do without all of it.
Just thought I would share those thoughts. Good night.
First of all, I really don't hate the holidays. I like Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc... I like the time I can spend with my family and friends this time of the year. I like some of the decorations, and some of the gift giving is ok too. Although, I do believe the gift giving and money spending is over rated.
My negative feelings towards the holidays stem from the loss of my uncle, who died 4 years ago. My uncle was a big part of my life, and he was part of what made the holidays so wonderful. He was just like a big ol' kid, especially at Christmas. He was just as excited as the kids were. Since his death, my attitude towards the holidays has deminished a lot. The holidays are not the same. There is a large void, and nothing seems to fill it.
I try to deal with it, for everyone elses sake, but I could do without all of it.
Just thought I would share those thoughts. Good night.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
I must be sick
I have good reason to believe that I am either currently sick, or am on the verge of getting that way. Care to know why I say that?
Well, I actually put a Christmas tree up in my living room last night. I must be sick, or something.
As far as the holiday is concerned, I don't really give a hoot in hell about it this year. I'm just not in the mood for all of the bullshit that goes along with it. There's a lot going on in my life, and with my family, and my mind is consumed by it all. I've been in a lot of pain, physically and mentally, and just don't feel like bothering with any of this festive holiday shit.
I have completed my Christmas shopping for the few people I really have give something, and will be sending Christmas cards to everyone else, but that is as far as my holiday cheerfulness goes.
Bah, humbug!
Well, I actually put a Christmas tree up in my living room last night. I must be sick, or something.
As far as the holiday is concerned, I don't really give a hoot in hell about it this year. I'm just not in the mood for all of the bullshit that goes along with it. There's a lot going on in my life, and with my family, and my mind is consumed by it all. I've been in a lot of pain, physically and mentally, and just don't feel like bothering with any of this festive holiday shit.
I have completed my Christmas shopping for the few people I really have give something, and will be sending Christmas cards to everyone else, but that is as far as my holiday cheerfulness goes.
Bah, humbug!
Monday, December 11, 2006
Family Matters
When faced with the imminent death of a loved one, one comes to realize just how much that person means to them, and to the family as a whole. As the effects of the coming events begin to spread through out the family, and you see how it tears people apart, you come to realize just how much family matters. I am now faced with such a situation; awaiting the coming death of my grandmother.
My mind is racing, as I'm trying to process what is happening, and prepare myself for the unpleasantness that will follow her passing. I am struggling with all of this, and am unsure just how I'm going to deal with everyone else. I'm finding that my mind is not on target; I'm constantly thinking about things in louisville, when I should be focused on working here in fort wayne.
I will be writing more as I have it in words, but for now, I can say no more.
My mind is racing, as I'm trying to process what is happening, and prepare myself for the unpleasantness that will follow her passing. I am struggling with all of this, and am unsure just how I'm going to deal with everyone else. I'm finding that my mind is not on target; I'm constantly thinking about things in louisville, when I should be focused on working here in fort wayne.
I will be writing more as I have it in words, but for now, I can say no more.
Friday, December 08, 2006
Thursday, December 07, 2006
First Snow
One clear sign that Christmas is right around the corner, is the first snow fall of the season. Well, Christmas must be on it's way, because Fort Wayne saw it's first snow accumulation overnight.
I awoke early this morning, and upon glancing out the window, found that about an inch of that cold white stuff blanketed everything. While it is pretty and all, I'm really not ready to deal with that stuff yet. Now, I'm not going to complain about it, because it will do no good. I will say, though, it's nasty and cold.
More later.
I awoke early this morning, and upon glancing out the window, found that about an inch of that cold white stuff blanketed everything. While it is pretty and all, I'm really not ready to deal with that stuff yet. Now, I'm not going to complain about it, because it will do no good. I will say, though, it's nasty and cold.
More later.
Monday, December 04, 2006
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